Thursday, February 16, 2006

From the what the hell was I thinking files...

I got home late last night, as I had the inspiration to spend some of my overtime pay on myself, so I hopped the bus to the old stomping grounds of Tower Records Lincoln Park. The Clark 22 bus, by the way, is about as quick a method of transportation as strapping a saddle to an iceberg. When I finally arrived, I did some requisite greetings with my former co-workers, and did some shopping. My goal was to pick up a copy of The Aristocrats, a movie I just had from Netflix that I laughed so hard at, I hurt myself. Admittedly, it is a gross movie, but still hilarious. My search turned out to be fruitless in that department, but I did find a couple other things that I don't need, but that I definitely wanted.

Fast forward to 6pm, I get home, and I see that my mail is abundant, and includes two Netflix shipments. At the time I wasn't really in the mood, but I checked them out anyways. One was a strange, boring documentary called Little Dieter Needs to Fly, about a son of a Nazi soldier who moved to the US to become a pilot only to be shot down on one of his first missions in Viet Nam. I guess at some point, this sounded cool, but I have to tell you that the whole movie seemed like I was being whined at.

The second was the 2005 remake of a classic, War of the Worlds. Let me tell you about this movie: it had more mistakes, plot errors and just general impossible scenarios than any movie I had ever seen. Not to mention that Mr. I-know-psychology's acting was just plain horrible, the kids were just plain boring, and the seemingly tacked-on role of his ex-wife was so one-dimensional I had a hard time believing that I wasn't watching cave drawings. The only part I really liked was the foghorn sound made by the alien tripods, which, I have just learned is a digitally remastered digiredoo.

I, my friends and readers, own a digiredoo. I'm not very good at it, but it is very fun to play.

Back to the point: This weekend, after I watched Aristocrats, I discovered that I had Timeline as well. I can't help it, I guess. My penchant for bad science fiction combined with my fascination with time travel cannot be conquered. This movie was just plain dumb, predictable, and a waste of my time.

So, after 3 bad movies in a row, my Netflix queue is definitely going underneath the magnifying glass, and I'm certain there'll be some deletions.


Blogger Henry said...

My roommate seems to work with a woman who has horrible tastes. He borrows movies from here. So avoid:

- The Cave
- Dark Water
- Little Black Book
- How to Loose a Guy in 10 Dates

Also, beware of fawned over French films. 90% of the suck.

9:12 AM  
Blogger cynthia said...

ha you watched a herzog doc for the history involved? i wrote my thesis on his docs, he is a total shyster and makes shit up. i recall something about one of dieter's speeches being completely made up by herzog and given to him to recite.

10:09 AM  
Blogger Dave said...

I'm not sure why I watched it. I guess I liked the juxtaposition of the son of a Nazi being a US pilot in Viet Nam.

It wouldn't surprise me if Herzog made up the entire movie, though. I smelled some serious bullshit, and turned it off about halfway through.

10:14 AM  

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